Healing Childhood Trauma

Why Self-Soothing Feels So Hard When You Have Anxious Attachment [Ep 32]

Lizandra Leigertwood Season 1 Episode 32

If you’ve ever stared at your phone waiting for a reply, heart racing, telling yourself not to text again but feeling like you physically can’t relax until they do — this episode is for you.


Self-soothing gets talked about a lot in the healing space… but for those with anxious attachment, it can feel almost impossible. In this episode, we unpack why that is — and what self-soothing actually looks like when you’re healing attachment wounds.


👉🏽 If this hits close to home, my 90-minute 1:1 Attachment Reset session is designed to support you in moments just like this. Learn more or book here.


In this episode, we explore:

💬 What self-soothing really is (and what it’s not)
🧠 Why it feels unsafe when you’re anxiously attached
📱 Why you can’t just “put the phone down” when you’re spiraling
🧘🏽‍♀️ What self-soothing can look like in practice — and why it’s not about fixing yourself
🌱 How to start small and build capacity gently, without shame


You’ll leave with a deeper understanding of your nervous system, why you crave connection so intensely, and how to start creating a sense of safety within yourself — even when someone else feels just out of reach.


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